You’re at the stage where you’ve settled down with the concept of stability channelled by true love.
Stage one tends to be when one is content with being with each other, exchanging memories, getting to know each other fully, intimately and deeply.
Stage two involves the desire for something that belongs to both; be it a house, a boat or a joint account.
Stage three involves a longing to taking care of something cute and fluffy; a puppy, a kitten or some other vulnerable animal.
Stage four. The desire to create a heartbeat.
You think it’s simple, right? After all, you’ve probably been on the pill or on some other form of contraception. Your gynecologist said everything is fine and all is in working order. You’re young, healthy, fit with no severe addictions. You hear of people getting pregnant all the time even when they’re careful, let alone when they’re not. The pregnancies you hear of from your close friends are smooth and free flowing without the thought of hitches or bumps.
Pregnancy is described as something beautiful, unfolding, intense and linked with joy, excitement and gradual change. No matter what the media spills onto it, pregnancy is a positive concept, something that brings a smile to everyone’s face. And it is.
But until that second line appears on that blessed piece of plastic, the suffering endured remains unexplained, uneducated, unspoken of, ignored, silenced. People remain naïve, ignorant, unaware, desensitised.
What I’ll be talking about in the coming weeks is the journey a woman takes until she transforms into a mother. It might not sound pretty, and it isn’t intended to add any more pain to those trying to conceive, but more so to reinforce solidarity, elicit the emotions one goes through to the surface in order to dampen the sadness, generate understanding and most importantly act as a coping tool that instills hope.
Bravery, patience, and reassurance that what you’re going through is 150% normal.
This blog post was written by a guest contributor who wishes to remain anonymous.