An Open Letter To The Pastor Who Filmed Me Changing My Baby’s Nappy

Dear Pastor Vincent (Antoinette) Fenech,

Thank you for taking the time to inform me about the changing facilities at Mater Dei hospital. I am now aware they exist and I am sure they are very convenient for anyone who is in need of a nappy changing facility while visiting the hospital for whatever reason.

Let me tell you a little bit about my day yesterday. As usual I was up at around 5:30am since my daughter thinks it is the perfect time to wake me up to play. This is, after having been up about 6 to 7 times during the night to care for  her because she either had a nightmare, or lost her dummy, or just missed mummy.

To top it all, yesterday was not a normal day however, because I took a day off from work to go and visit my daughter’s surgeon in hospital. For days this visit had made me anxious, not only for the nature of the visit, but also because I was aware of what a terrible hassle it is to for me to get to Mater Dei due to traffic and also I have had issues with parking in the past.

This time my husband came with me, so that I could visit the doctor while he went to park the car. On the way to the hospital my daughter needed to go to do number 2. Unfortunately I couldn’t ask her to wait until we reached the hospital and suitable facilities; she is only 14 months old! So, she went in the car, in her nappy, which is usually fine.

I quickly assessed the situation, and deemed that the only thing I could do was to quickly get her out of these clothes, and try to get most of the feces off her little body before taking her inside to wash her properly.

For some reason, this time the amount she managed to produce was just completely overwhelming. I am not sure if you, Mr. Fenech, have ever changed a nappy in your life, but I would like to inform you, since you care so much about what other people do, that this was not your normal average daily nappy.

We rushed to get to the hospital to be able to pull to the side to get her out of her car seat. As I lifted her out, I realised there was no area of her body I could lift her from other than her arms, that luckily were not affected… yet. I quickly assessed the situation, and deemed that the only thing I could do was to quickly get her out of these clothes, and try to get most of the feces off her little body before taking her inside to wash her properly.

Yes there was a mat, she wasn’t placed naked on the asphalt.

I couldn’t in any way figure out a way to transport her inside before having done this. I couldn’t put her in the pram to drive her inside, nor could I carry her, the changing bag and pram, as I would have had her against my body, covering myself in poop as well.

I had no idea this was a bus lane, because when I got there, there were no buses. I thought this was just a car drop-off zone, so I lay out her thick padded changing mat as far away from the curb I could possibly get (yes there was a mat, she wasn’t placed naked on the asphalt). Then I put her pram on the side of the curb to let cars know we are there, and to make us visible.

During this whole very messy procedure I kept my daughter well shaded from the sun, and I tried to be as quick and efficient as I could, because, trust me, I did NOT enjoy this operation. As soon as I managed to get her out of the mess, I put on a new clean nappy and rushed inside to wash and clean her properly.

I am not proud about my choice of location, and I am surely not happy this had to happen, but I am going to be straight with you dear Pastor. I saved my daughter from a very uncomfortable situation in the best way I could. You Mr. Fenech, on the other hand, witnessed this whole ordeal and instead of asking me if I needed any help, you chose to film it and then publish this on a public viral website!

By the time I saw your post it had already been watched by 18,968 people and shared no less than 226 times! A video of me and my daughter in a very challenging situation. A video of my daughter who is only 14 months old! God knows who has seen this video and downloaded it. I have no idea what sick people might have this video in their hands thanks to you Mr. Fenech.

I took a very quick decision in a very pressed situation, and yes in retrospect I agree it was not ideal. But how much worse is it that you, who had the time to consider all your options calmly without having to deal with a crying baby swimming in poop.

YOU Mr. Fenech took a conscious decision to shame me.